When people told me that my babies would, ‘grow up in the blink of an eye, so just enjoy it,’ I popped that little nugget right up alongside the, ‘sleep when the baby sleeps,’ rubbish.
You see, it was always said by a smiling elderly lady at the supermarket whilst the kids were screaming for chocolate, or wrestling over a Spiderman mask, or as I was wiping vomit off my freshly washed shirt…never really a good time to talk to a flustered, embarrassed and exhausted Mum. It was DDDRRRRAAAAAGGGGIIINNNGGGG on FOREVER. The poonamis, the sleepless nights, the public tantrums, the food fights AND the rest…..
But….
But…they were right.
Because suddenly, all those inane dramas that felt so incredibly huge at the time, have changed. The madness of the baby years has lifted lightly. Truth be told, I have never been a ‘baby’ person, and this didn’t change even when they were my own. Sure-I would do everything and anything for my children’s safety and happiness, but my patience is ever so thin. Those early years are a blur!!! But now, when I heard myself telling the physio earlier that my back is hurting when I pick my ‘baby’ up…then had to clarify that I meant my four year old, I felt like a right idiot.
My ‘babies’ are now 6 & 4.
Life has changed.
Whilst it ‘seems’ easier, I want to share with you some of the juicier morsels of parenting kids who think they are all ‘big kids’ now, but are essentially still little.
Here are some of the moments/parenting goals I dreamed about, and what they actually look like in reality.
When you can finally go out and plonk a big bowl of chips in front of them.
Yes, yes…sometimes food of course, but I dreamt about the day they would be old enough to sit quietly and give me a chance to eat lunch or dinner ‘out in the real world’ with a friend. Just 10 minutes. Just some peace. Just some quiet; a moment where I wasn’t chasing them about a cafe and dragging them out from beneath tables, all whilst trying to avoid the steely glares of the wait staff. And now? Wherever we go, a bowl of chips is all he will eat. Hot chips. No nuggets. No fish. DEFINITELY no salad. No nothing; except chips. With a big slug of tomato sauce (which I despise, so he didn’t get that from me!). Mother guilt 101.
When they can get in the car and do up their own seat belts.
Just getting loaded up can be exhausting. Getting the bags in the front, around to each side of the car, straps on, buckles belted, drink bottles within reach, picking up a dropped toy, running back to the house because they forgot their ‘special’ toy…. It is tough. But I am so close. I have one who sorts himself (once I worked out how to get the kid lock off his door). The other still needs help, but she can get herself in and half way there. Now it is up to me to be patient. Normally by the time we hit the car, we are running behind. Whilst I want to allow her time to learn to get her seat belt on correctly in a stress free environment (ie : NOT me squawking on repeat that we’re going to be late), it feels like we are constantly in a hurry. I squawk, she fumbles and I inevitably click it up for her, vowing tomorrow will be a better day. It will…surely…
Craft time together
Lawwwddyyyy how I despise craft. I need some incredible bout of energy to head down this trail, or something so fabulous (and easy) I know it will be just amazing for the kids. I once wished for the day the little loves would colour in quietly, or draw pictures of rainbows. Now it’s just, “Can you sharpen this? Where’s the blue paper. It HAS to be blue! She’s got the black and I NEED it NOW!’ It only lasts for 5 minutes, despite the amount of preparation I have put in. My daughter also has an obsession with bringing home massive boxes from kinder with two cotton balls stuck on it, proclaiming it’s a masterpiece. What on earth does one do with all their artwork???? The fridge is only so big!
Dressing herself
Remember trying to dress a tiny baby? I was always certain I would break them forcing their little arms and legs down cute little onesies. Then they began to roll around and the game was on. Now my kids can dress themselves. Another test in patience and acceptance. She comes out in quite some outfits. Spots and tutus and tiaras and gumboots and leopard skin and all sorts of combinations and whilst I am over the moon at her initiative and indepence, I feel like I need to tell every person I see that she did this (not me)! She also wants to be responsible for her own hair, even if she can’t reach the clumps at the back. I have to be incredibly creative to get my hands on that birdsnest, without crushing her drive. The morning battles start waaayyyy too early!
Self toileting
Cannot ever express how pleased I am to have a nappy free home. I truly don’t know how I survived. The whole concept is hideous. Nonetheless, the next stages are tricky, too, and I really never saw it coming. Don’t wish to say too much, but the bum wiping of bigger kids is still revolting. Now I am wrestling with the WIPE IT PROPERLY battle. Enough said.
And so, as the wise women in the supermarkets would know, (especially to the Mum’s with little babies), be careful what you wish for (is the grass actually greener?)…for it truly passes in the blink of an eye.
