And in a PFFFFTTTT of ‘I told you it goes by fast’, my babies are gone and I am the mother of 2 school kids!!!
You see, there are many stages of parenting. But this particular jump has left me reeling. There is so much information out there for mum’s of babies, that I have felt compelled to share with you what I have learnt (so far) as my kids have grown older.
Sleep. It is the word we have all thrown around since the very beginning.
Even before the baby arrived, our hormonal sleep patterns took a nose dive and this has been a common discussion of mine now for years. I did it all. I rocked, I patted, I nursed, I ignored, I fed, I lay down, I shut the door, I cried, too!
Now, finally, FINALLY, my kids are older, and they are actually sleeping better. In my case, once they get to sleep, they generally make it through till the morning (note my use of the word *once. We are definitely struggling to get one little angel actually TO sleep at the moment.) But what happens? That full night of sleep you once fantasised about is finally in your grasp and what do you do? You lie awake. You worry about all the ‘stuff’. You stare at the ceiling. You roll over. You give up. You get up and go check exactly WHY your kids are still asleep. You adjust blankets. Go back to bed. Worry that now they might be too hot. You toss and turn. Morning. Cruel irony at its finest. Sleep still taunts me.
They are code crackers.
Uh-hu. You read that right. No more can you ask the husband to grab out some c-h-o-c-o-l-a-t-e.
“Chocolate?” says the boy. “What chocolate? I WANT SOME!!!”
Sure, it’s great that his spelling is really coming along, but no longer can you spell out secrets. Or worse, DO NOT leave out Christmas shopping lists on the kitchen bench.
No more nappies!! Hoo(beeping)Ray! Really? Sure about that?
Well, yes. I am sure. Nappies were horrific and I think I am still traumatised regardless if the babies were of my flesh and blood or not, it is still poo. But wait a minute. I was triumphant. I was fist pumping, nappy free. Finally. After years.
But hang on. There are no chapters in the guide books reminding us that poo and wee will still haunt us. For who amongst us has not shouted at some stage, “WHO DID WEE ON THE TOILET FLOOR?” or “FLUSH THE TOILET!!!” But wait. Worse still. Why is there now regular seat smearing? Is this a thing or am I just the lucky one? Now I don’t want to dwell here, but this stage of teaching the kids just how to get it right is never discussed. There are also the regular tell tale signs of misadventure in the undies. Give me strength.
Now you have a couple of little soaks.
Be warned. Nothing…I repeat NOTHING goes through to the keeper. They may be playing intently with their Pokemon cards, but trust me, they will hear a swear word uttered under your breath from any corner of the house. There is also a high likelihood it will then be repeated by your little cherub at any inopportune moment.
The worrying goes on and on…and on.
I know. Once it was like, “if only I can get to the point where they can do things for themselves, be a little more independent….” And guess what? That day does actually (gradually) happen. But the worry never leaves. In fact, now that they are off, doing things for themselves, often out of your care, taking calculated risks, the worry tends to intensify. Losing that control can be both liberating and exhausting. And the good news? Apparently, according to my own parents, it never ends.
And on they roll.
Changing, growing, learning. It is pretty incredible. I often stop and look at my big babies. Sometimes, I try to put my 7 year old son on my lap and he still curls his little head in under my chin, but his long legs are so gangly and bruised and hairy and boyish now. This is such a special time and I must admit, I am a much better kid mama than baby mama.
There is also so much to enjoy. Especially now that I am beginning to understand just how fast it flies (like they all told me it would).
Oh the love notes I get. Full of hearts and pictures and kisses. The impromptu “I love you’s”, the neck massages, the stories about “Our Family” in their workbooks that make my heart boom. I can pop to the shops with the kids for a few things without the rigmarole of a nappy bag. They can click on their own seat belts and get themselves a drink of water. The playground swing can fly high without me and sometimes, they can be found playing ‘nicely’ together.
Who knew the rollercoaster would be so epic?
Now, if only we could sort the sleep issues out…..
It seems I am pretty ‘fantastic’ at this gig. Just check out some of the other parenting mistakes that I have made.
