Aftermy 19th kick to the kidneys in bed at 3am this morning (yes,
yes…she sneaks in with us…whatever), I forced myself to remember that this
would not last forever. The morning snuggle and ‘energetic’ face
stroke…(slap…”Wake up, Mummy!”…slap) would soon be a distant memory and I
would miss these moments – just the two of us. Soon she will be a hormonal
teenager, storming through the house, slamming all the doors in her path and I
know I will miss the innocence of my baby girl.
But,
truth be told, there are many things
that I will not miss about the baby
dayzzz. Nope; not for a second. When I
am out with my sister and we see a woman with a tiny baby, she goes all cooey
and gushy. I blink and think, “Amen, I am sooo past that!” And we are. Husband
and I are done, done, donedy, done. Happy, forever grateful and complete.
truth be told, there are many things
that I will not miss about the baby
dayzzz. Nope; not for a second. When I
am out with my sister and we see a woman with a tiny baby, she goes all cooey
and gushy. I blink and think, “Amen, I am sooo past that!” And we are. Husband
and I are done, done, donedy, done. Happy, forever grateful and complete.
So
here are just a few things I will happily slam the door shut on in the Mummy
Avenue….
here are just a few things I will happily slam the door shut on in the Mummy
Avenue….
NIGHT
FEEDS…(well…night anything and everything, really…)
FEEDS…(well…night anything and everything, really…)
The
pain of sitting frozen, for fear of disturbing my voracious feeder, still
wreaks havoc on my neck and back today. Boredom, monotony, darkness, cold,
exhaustion…over and over again, night after night. At least, in the early
days, I could knock over a few box TV series, but oh the heartbreak when the
light, TV or any slight movement would
interrupt him and I was left sitting frozen in the dark. In silence, I would
scream as baby boy suddenly shifted position and a delicate arc of milk would
spray across the couch (to be dealt with tomorrow..Amen for leather). Then, the
floorboard pacing began. Yes; I should have put him straight down, but I didn’t.
I cuddled, rocked and counted my paces. We both survived…just.
pain of sitting frozen, for fear of disturbing my voracious feeder, still
wreaks havoc on my neck and back today. Boredom, monotony, darkness, cold,
exhaustion…over and over again, night after night. At least, in the early
days, I could knock over a few box TV series, but oh the heartbreak when the
light, TV or any slight movement would
interrupt him and I was left sitting frozen in the dark. In silence, I would
scream as baby boy suddenly shifted position and a delicate arc of milk would
spray across the couch (to be dealt with tomorrow..Amen for leather). Then, the
floorboard pacing began. Yes; I should have put him straight down, but I didn’t.
I cuddled, rocked and counted my paces. We both survived…just.
CAPSULE
CARRYING
CARRYING
Sweet
cherries, I had no idea just how much these contraptions weighed! The ease of a ‘click in and out’ capsule, completely appealed to my sense of “for the love of
God, NEVER wake a sleeping baby,” shortcut. But though they did wonders for my
guns, it ripped my aforementioned back to pieces. Seriously, when I see a
parent dragging one of those about, I want to fall to my knees and bow down
before them. Just popping in to grab some bread and milk with a capsule is just
an illusion. There is no ‘just
popping in’ anywhere!
cherries, I had no idea just how much these contraptions weighed! The ease of a ‘click in and out’ capsule, completely appealed to my sense of “for the love of
God, NEVER wake a sleeping baby,” shortcut. But though they did wonders for my
guns, it ripped my aforementioned back to pieces. Seriously, when I see a
parent dragging one of those about, I want to fall to my knees and bow down
before them. Just popping in to grab some bread and milk with a capsule is just
an illusion. There is no ‘just
popping in’ anywhere!
PUREEING
BABY FOOD
BABY FOOD
Well…if
it looks like poo…??? Just saying…
it looks like poo…??? Just saying…
Seriously,
simply mashing a banana with a fork makes me want to gag, so this was torture
for me. All that wet, squishy, ‘ruined’ food. And yes, I am totally (& proudly)
owning that I sometimes emptied bought bags into plastic containers and spooned
it out as my own creations.
simply mashing a banana with a fork makes me want to gag, so this was torture
for me. All that wet, squishy, ‘ruined’ food. And yes, I am totally (& proudly)
owning that I sometimes emptied bought bags into plastic containers and spooned
it out as my own creations.
 |
| Or…our now 2 year old proudly ‘puree’s’ her own…HEAVE! |
CLINKING
COT RAIL
COT RAIL
I
could not get our daughter in a bed quick enough.
could not get our daughter in a bed quick enough.
I
never understand how you transferred a sleeping baby into the cot and then
clunked the side rail back up (yes…yes…again…I know they should fall
asleep themselves in the cot, but we short-cutted everywhere with our
second…I’ve not called this blog Mummy Muckups for nothing!) CLUNK! Baby’s eyes would
immediately fly open, he would roar and I was back to square one. Then, when I
did develop ‘best practices’ or whatever,
I sat beside that damned cot and patted and shooshed and sung and patted and
counted and recited song lyrics and said the alphabet in reverse and then
patted some more. Sometimes I had a win; very often I didn’t.
never understand how you transferred a sleeping baby into the cot and then
clunked the side rail back up (yes…yes…again…I know they should fall
asleep themselves in the cot, but we short-cutted everywhere with our
second…I’ve not called this blog Mummy Muckups for nothing!) CLUNK! Baby’s eyes would
immediately fly open, he would roar and I was back to square one. Then, when I
did develop ‘best practices’ or whatever,
I sat beside that damned cot and patted and shooshed and sung and patted and
counted and recited song lyrics and said the alphabet in reverse and then
patted some more. Sometimes I had a win; very often I didn’t.
So…
Farewell to
breastfeeding singlets.
breastfeeding singlets.
See ya’
later
to ridiculous lullaby CD’s in the car.
later
to ridiculous lullaby CD’s in the car.
Good
riddance
to cafes’ without high chairs.
riddance
to cafes’ without high chairs.
Goodbye to
sterilising water and impossible to clean bottles.
sterilising water and impossible to clean bottles.
It’s
been quite a ride, my old friends, and I know I may one day look back at you
lovingly with a pang of nostalgia for my tiny babies…but not now…no
way…just keep walking….
been quite a ride, my old friends, and I know I may one day look back at you
lovingly with a pang of nostalgia for my tiny babies…but not now…no
way…just keep walking….
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